CHRISTIAN ONE LINERS
* Don’t let your worries get the best of you; Remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
* Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited Until you try to sit in their pews.
* Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers.
* It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
* The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
* When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there.
* People are funny; they want the front of the bus, middle of the road, and back of the church.
* Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on the front door forever.
* Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.
* If a church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
* God Himself doesn’t propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
* Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
* Peace starts with a smile.
* I don’t know why some people change churches; What difference does it make which one you stay home from?
* A lot of church members singing ‘Standing on the Promises’ are just sitting on the premises.
* Be ye fishers of men. You catch ’em – He’ll clean ’em.
* Stop, Drop, and Roll won’t work in Hell.
* Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
* Don’t put a question mark where God put a period.
* Forbidden fruits create many jams.
* God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
* God grades on the cross, not the curve.
* God loves everyone, but probably prefers ‘fruits of the spirit’ over ‘religious nuts!’
* God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
* He who angers you, controls you!
* If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!
* Prayer: Don’t give God instructions, just report for duty!
* The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
* The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
* We don’t change the message, the message changes us.
* You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
* The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.
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